Hell...it's been like, two weeks...three since my last proper post? Yeah, I'm sorry bout that. Well, funnily enough, the main reason is the time and mood wasnt there the last weeks. So many ups and downs...a whole lot of downs lately but yeah what better way to be back in the mood and having the time to post in the middle of night! Hahah
I got up early yesterday, which I've been starting to do the past few days (fucking early field trips fault, ruined my eternal clock), ended up feeling sleepy in the middle of the day. Overslept....so overslept.... I blame it on the weather...well, I blame it on stress as well but yeah, the weather decided to become cold again, so it gave me this gigantio migrane and I went home skipping my GEOS lab. That was around 2, 3? Took some pills and slept after asar....got up....a few hours ago which was just after midnight. haha, I overslept and I have a shit load of work to do. I'm pumping myself up full of coffee to stay awake.
DEDICATED TO RUDI and everyone else!
Reading blogs....realised I missed Rudi's take off to Scotland. nasibku sempat chat with him the day before. Wanted to call, but yeah.... was asleep. Two years engineering..... god, gonna miss that guy. Asked him to get a blog, which i hope he does, wanna noe how a scotsman's life is. Rudi was my PS buddy at MD along with Azam and Mimi, Kuching....Amar and Hayat? Can't remember...hahah. Been my classmate since form 4...only became good friends in the two years of form 6. Sat next to him in Maths in Sir Wan's class. Shit..... gonna miss those good all times. Fuck, i feel sad now. hahah. huweh...the lame jokes, the stories...President Rudi of Nature club, the hockey stories, the football stories...the porn stories.... hahah hot and wet bench talk. Ahan Thai eats, Mr Pizza Eats, coffee bean drinks with Amar, bbq's, movies road trips. Owe a lot to this guy. Well good luck man, you're a swell guy. Good luck to you with your Studies in Scotland and all your future endeavours. Thank you for all those time spent with all your friends, we appreciate it...i appreciate it. Laps you man and gonna miss you. heheh gay moment there.
haha, now I'm all depressed again. Well, reading Amar's blog got me depressed, just typing this has increased the depression levels. Got me thinking again....Rudi off....Soon more people will be....heard Hayat's gonna be off.....the Shell UK batch people will be off in a few weeks, so prob Azam will be gone as well. People are getting scholarships here and there and dissappearing. I dissappeared early, so that doesnt really matter. You guys have been waiting for so long, hahah, had to listen to all that bitching and complaining, god I wont get it, i hate waiting, I hate MOE, blablabla, well u got it now people whether yur flying off or in UBD, ITB, etc, u still got it! hahahha, I demand compensation for all the misery u guys passed on to me. hahah, wow...I'm so happy for you guys you know, a dream come true. The wait is over...you're where ur supposed to be and all that hard work and praying payed off. congratulations, be happy and celebrate okay! No more complaining and mnyamaling and being jealous and badmouthing, XD
Huweh.... thinking of home too much. Well, I think of home everyday, but lately its been to the point of heartache and tears. Yeah, I cried...its been awhile. it was during the geos field trip, sorri to those who saw. hahah, dunno what the hell came over me. It was the night before I guess, was dreaming bout home and before I knew it, I was awake with tears all over my face. So fucking emo...hahah, yeah I miss my family. The day of the Geos Trip was the last day of my uncles wedding, so i really felt it on the bus, thinking about missing everything and not being there to help. Was reading the handout and suddenly, this pain just popped into my chest and I cudnt hold back anymore. hahaha, that's how much I miss you guys okay, so don't come up to me on MSN and say I'm being ambong kembang or whatever and inda layan u guys. Shit...sometimes it annoys me like hell that you guys think you act as if you know what the fuckis going on when in fact you don't know shit. I know some of you are depressed and have fucked up lives as well but don't go around comparing how your life sucks as much as anyone elses cause there's no fucking point. It's pathetic and disgusting. Bsyukurtah once in awhile, I don't throw about my shitty life and make it my focal point as if your proud that your life is shitty. yes...I get depressed, I suck at shoolwork and I dunt play sports but hell, I get over it or try to get better. Your adults, your Muslims, get the hell over yourself. There's this one person, who was so fucking full of herself and wudnt even open up to the fact that life's more than hiding behind her own scars that it was so...ugh....It's hard for me to even talk about it. Mental ku pikirkn. Yeah, I dunt noe what the hell u been through but heck people shudnt demand symphathy and make people feel depressed about it. I know she doesnt read this blog, hell, I dont even know if she wants anything to do with me anymore, but yeah, I just wanna say it and let it all out. I'm sorry for what I said, but get over it, and there's more to life than being right all the time and I maybe I was wrong to say all those things. I may be full of hypocrisy sometimes, but yeah I'm learning as well, why don't you?
Wow...I don't know if I feel better or worse after typing that. It's high school all over again and I'm not even in a fucking relationship. hahha, yeah anyways, we'll talk about something else. Hmm... well, I did a lotta stuff that was worth mentioning but I'm running out of time. I'll post random pics for now. Sorry for bitchiness and the asshole talk. XD
GEOS FIELD TRIP
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